Car Accident-Dane Cook

[ti:Car Accident] [ar:Dane Cook] [al:I Did My Best - Greatest Hits] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.42]We love car accidents in this country [00:01.58] [00:02.13]We're obsessed with car accidents [00:03.21] [00:04.23]I know your like me it's like 2 in the morning [00:06.41]It's dead quiet [00:07.22] [00:07.83]Your in you're house watching tv your in bed [00:10.07]All of a sudden outside at the corner you hear [00:11.74] [00:15.88]Damn it Sh*t that sounded like it was going to hit [00:21.26] [00:23.08]You always want it to hit Come on [00:25.80] [00:27.20]Nothing Uh [00:27.92] [00:29.68]Then when you finally hear the crash your psyched it's like [00:32.08] [00:32.64]Where are my shoes Yes where are my shoes [00:35.53] [00:37.03]Have you seen my shoes F**k it I'm going out without shoes [00:39.28] [00:40.69]I'm going out shoeless Right you come out of you're house [00:46.21]All you're neighbours are coming out everyones coming out [00:47.92]Your like waving at each other [00:49.06]You're psyched to see each other [00:50.21]Come on let's go you wanna go together [00:51.70]Come on let's go you me and you no no [00:53.54]You wait for the next group [00:54.64]You wait for the next group [00:55.51] [00:56.66]We'll go as a team no no you wait [00:58.16]You wait for the next group [00:59.05] [01:05.85]Then you get out there it's no big deal [01:07.60]But everyone stands out there for like 2 extra hours [01:09.58] [01:10.73]It's over no ones hurt or anything [01:12.26]But everyone has to stay out there [01:13.43] [01:14.31]Even if it's hot everyone acts like it's cold and sh*t [01:16.69]Hey what's up [01:18.46] [01:21.49]Just had to see what was going on [01:22.71] [01:25.80]And It doesn't matter who you start talking to [01:27.48]I guarantee everyone is having the same exact conversation [01:29.96] [01:30.80]No matter who you get into it with [01:32.04]All anybody is saying like back [01:33.06]And forth is like Yeah yeah well no I was in my kitchen [01:36.01]And I heard it so I came out [01:37.55] [01:39.74]You were in your living room [01:40.74]I was in my kitchen cleaning a dish [01:42.56]I heard it I came out [01:43.84] [01:45.88]What you were in you're basement [01:47.16]He was in his living [01:47.97]I was in the kitchen cleaning a dish [01:49.50] [01:50.79]I was really cleaning [01:51.79]And I heard it so I came out [01:53.38] [01:54.25]What Shoes No no F**k shoes [01:55.68] [01:57.03]Haha shoes hahaha listen to this guy with shoes [02:00.44]Hahaha you Shoes over here [02:04.51] [02:06.69]And everyone always wants to be a part of like the police [02:09.94]You know what I mean We always wanna be involved [02:11.87] [02:12.78]We wanna talk to the cops when ever they come to your you know [02:15.54]Officer yeah yeah I'm sorry yeah I just want you to know [02:18.27]If it helps in your investigation I was in my kitchen [02:20.29] [02:21.67]And I heard it [02:22.51]So I came out I will testify in court I was cleaning a dish [02:26.67] [02:27.51]I will bring the dish as exhibit [02:28.63] [02:29.94]And this guy he was in his basement [02:31.53]Tell him what you told me tell him what you told me [02:34.61] [02:35.59]That's not what he told me [02:36.63] [02:37.88]He's lying that's not what you told me [02:40.17]Car Accident - Dane Cook