Everything You Know Is Wrong-Weird Al Yankovic

[ti:Everything You Know Is Wrong] [ar:"Weird Al" Yankovic] [al:Bad Hair Day] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]Everything You Know Is Wrong (你知道的都不对) - Weird Al Yankovic (“怪人奥尔”扬科维奇) [00:09.70]I was driving on the freeway in the fast lane [00:12.97]With a rabid wolverine in my underwear [00:16.39]When suddenly a guy behind me in the backseat [00:19.37]Popped right up and cupped his hands across my eyes [00:21.87]I guessed is it Uncle Frank or Cousin Louie [00:24.88]Is it Bob or Joe or Walter [00:27.01]Could it be Bill or Jim or Ed [00:28.68]Or Bernie or Steve [00:29.93]I probably would have kept on guessing [00:31.23]But about that time we crashed into a truck [00:33.70]And as I'm laying bleeding there on the asphalt [00:36.79]Finally I recognize the face of my Hibachi dealer [00:41.90]Who takes off his prosthetic lips and tells me [00:45.43]Everything you know is wrong [00:48.35]Black is white up is down and short is long [00:51.43]And everything you thought was just so important doesn't matter [00:56.94]Everything you know is wrong [01:00.46]Just forget the words and sing along [01:03.27]All you need to understand is [01:05.80]Everything you know is wrong [01:09.36]I was walking to the kitchen for some Golden Grahams [01:13.10]When I accidentally stepped into an alternate dimension [01:17.01]And soon I was abducted by some aliens from space [01:19.64]Who kinda looked like Jamie Farr [01:21.51]The sucked out my internal organs [01:23.62]And they took some Polaroids [01:25.40]And said I was a darn good sport [01:27.09]And as a way of saying thank you [01:28.97]They offered to transport me back to any point in history [01:31.70]That I would care to go [01:33.41]And so I had them send me back to last Thursday night [01:36.87]So I could pay my phone bill on time [01:38.99]But then the floating disembodied head of Colonel Sanders started yelling [01:44.54]Everything you know is wrong [01:47.99]Black is white up is down and short is long [01:50.95]And everything you thought was just so important doesn't matter [01:56.57]Everything you know is wrong [01:59.92]Just forget the words and sing along [02:02.92]All you need to understand is [02:05.48]Everything you know is wrong [02:08.65] [02:44.57]I was just about to mail a letter to my evil twin [02:48.27]When I got a nasty paper cut [02:51.25]And well to make a long story short [02:53.41]It got infected and I died [02:55.69]So now I'm up in heaven with Saint Peter by the pearly gates [03:00.18]And it's obvious he doesn't like the Nehru jacket that I'm wearing [03:04.99]He tells me that they've got a dress code [03:08.15]Well he lets me into Heaven anyway [03:10.55]But I get the room next to the noisy ice machine for all eternity and [03:16.99]Every day he runs by screaming [03:19.96]Everything you know is wrong [03:23.39]Black is white up is down and short is long [03:26.39]And everything you used to think was so important [03:28.73]Doesn't really matter anymore [03:30.40]Because the simple fact remains that [03:32.09]Everything you know is wrong [03:35.22]Just forget the words and sing along [03:38.25]All you need to understand is that [03:41.20]Everything you know is wrong [03:42.67]Everything you know is wrong [03:44.10]Everything you know is wrong