My Carphone's On The Pill-Rugburns

[ti:My Carphone's On The Pill] [ar:Rugburns] [al:Morning Wood] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]My Carphone's On The Pill - Rugburns [00:13.89]My carphones on the pill [00:15.47]And my girfriends got call waiting [00:17.25]Satans in the bagels [00:18.24]And my toasters masturbating [00:20.09]My computer has hard drive [00:21.42]And my disk is always floppy [00:22.95]My xerox has the runs [00:24.28]And it won't stop shitting copies [00:25.35]Help me [00:25.98] [00:28.70]My paper want's some coffee [00:29.54]And my mother needs recycling [00:30.85] [00:31.40]My fax is getting acne [00:32.81]And it needs some tetracyclene [00:34.43]My dog is late for school [00:35.74]And my son pissed on the floor [00:37.25]The percolators drooling [00:38.54]And the babys at the store [00:39.71]Would you help me please [00:40.96] [00:43.09]The TV's watching me [00:44.17]And my control is in remote [00:45.82]Grandpas sucking carpet [00:47.27]And the vacuum stole my coat [00:48.79]And the birds are smoking cocaine [00:49.86]And my son lives in a nest [00:51.51]My daughter just got neutered [00:52.97]And my cat just got fake breasts [00:54.21]Now help me please [00:55.38] [01:08.82]Yeah TV rules the house now [01:10.11]Mr cartwright is the boss [01:11.80]Gingers kissing maryann [01:12.91]And I'm in love with hoss [01:14.77]Thurston howe'll first is lusting [01:16.22]After mary tyler [01:17.67]More is always less that mr [01:19.26]Douglas is a styler [01:20.63]Green acres is the place to be [01:22.14]That eb is such a dork [01:23.55]He hit arnold the pig [01:24.63]And so tonight were eating pork [01:26.20]Help me [01:26.85] [01:41.16]My coffee lost it's dentures [01:42.15]And my father needs reheating [01:43.90]My wife is always empty [01:45.10]And the fridge is always eating [01:46.75]The dust pans playng marbles [01:47.94]And the kids are in the sink [01:49.73]And the heater won't quit farting [01:51.04]And my mental health it stinks [01:52.05]Now help me please [01:53.57] [01:55.61]My car went to the movies [01:56.68]And I'm locked in my garage [01:58.23]My bathroom went to art school [01:59.64]Now I piss in a collage [02:01.12]And the blender stole my credit cards [02:02.52]And bought some fancy duds [02:04.01]Everyone has patriots [02:05.49]But all I have are scuds [02:06.82]Help me please [02:07.68] [02:21.61]My carphones on the pill [02:23.25]And my girfriends got call waiting [02:25.57]Satans in the bagels [02:27.46]And my toasters masturbating [02:29.81]Help me please