The Hole (2006 Digital Remaster)-Jake Thackray

[ti:The Hole] [ar:Jake Thackray] [al:Jake In A Box (The EMI Recordings 1967-1976)] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]The Hole (2006 Digital Remaster) - Jake Thackray [00:10.38]After work on Friday I was waiting for a bus [00:14.55]Me mouth was dropping open [00:16.28]And my gaze was vacuous [00:18.16]And in the British worker's classic pose [00:20.83]I was leaning on a door [00:22.89]When half way down the wormy woodwork [00:25.28]Quite by chance I saw a little hole [00:27.74] [00:31.55]Well I know it sounds ridiculous [00:33.54]I know it's awfully odd [00:34.71] [00:35.48]But I suddenly felt like giving that [00:37.61]Little hole a furtive prod [00:39.20]So I popped my finger in and [00:41.36]Then I waggled it about [00:43.39]But once I'd got the bleeder in [00:45.14]I couldn't get the bleeder out of the hole [00:48.31] [00:49.69]The hole [00:50.45] [00:53.02]Just a little hole in a door in a door [00:56.12]Opposite the bus stop of the number 74 [00:58.42] [00:59.12]Suddenly my humdrum life was out of my control [01:02.36]When I set my wretched eyes upon the hole [01:05.00] [01:09.16]Into the night I heaved and strained [01:11.47]But still without success [01:13.15]Then a constable came and asked [01:14.87]Me for me name and me address [01:16.83]He said "I can pull you in for loitering [01:18.89]And maliciously lingering - [01:21.48]"And furthermore you're not supposed [01:23.43]To have your finger in that there 'ole " [01:27.38]The hole [01:28.17] [01:30.69]Just a little hole in a door in a door [01:33.74]How was I to know that I was breaking [01:35.77]The law [01:36.68]They sent a big Alsatian and a vice squad patrol [01:39.25] [01:39.84]When they heard about my finger and the hole [01:42.93] [01:46.40]A crowd sprang up the streets were full [01:48.53]The public formed a queue [01:50.43]The national press and the BBC [01:52.60]Got ready to interview [01:54.06]They said "Just smile please [01:55.49]For the cameras and do stop fidgeting [01:57.53] [01:58.39]"Now tell the world just what it feels [02:00.61]Like with your digit inside a hole " [02:02.86] [02:04.26]The hole [02:04.98] [02:07.75]Just a little hole in a door in a door [02:10.77]Small dark recess; nothing less nothing more [02:13.47]It may seem quite absurd but [02:14.94]It is anything but droll [02:16.99]Posing for your picture with your [02:18.45]Finger up a hole [02:19.88] [02:23.14]And then they sent a special doctor [02:24.96]With a special rubber glove [02:26.98]And a very special finger and a very special shove [02:30.05] [02:30.92]And he stroked around and groped around [02:33.19]And wrote down in his book [02:34.67]"The patient is doing nicely but he's got [02:37.66]His finger stuck up a hole " [02:39.98] [02:41.01]The hole [02:41.54] [02:44.00]Just a little hole in a door in a door [02:46.97]Up came the Fire Brigade with choppers galore [02:49.88]The door flew off its hinges; [02:51.40]It was quite a rigmarole [02:53.02]They took us off to prison: me the door [02:55.31]And the hole [02:56.14] [02:59.40]And then when I appeared in court [03:01.48]I cried "M'Lud it isn't fair [03:03.79]"Man will always poke up holes m'Lud [03:06.14]Because they're there [03:07.61]"I'm innocent I've drunk too deeply [03:09.70]From life's bitter cup; [03:11.17] [03:11.69]"And if you don't believe me get yer [03:13.77]Worshipful finger up any old hole " [03:16.06] [03:17.81]The hole [03:18.45] [03:20.73]Just a little hole in a door in a door [03:23.51]Seems I've got to live with it for now and evermore [03:26.50]So vicar come and give a [03:28.44]Wash-and-brush-up to me soul [03:29.75]'Cos I'm off to meet me Maker [03:31.44]With me finger up an everlasting hole