I Wish I Was Queer So I Could-Bloodhound Gang

[ti:I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks (explicit Album Version Explicit)] [ar:Bloodhound Gang] [al:One Fierce Beer Coaster (Explicit)] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]I Wish I Was Queer So I Could - Bloodhound Gang [00:01.34]If your a** is a chinese restaurant [00:03.83] [00:05.24]I'll have the poo poo platter [00:07.00] [00:08.42]My friend jerry vandergrift kissed me in home class [00:11.49] [00:13.36]Later in the afternoon some jarheads [00:15.59]In the locker room kicked my a** [00:17.43] [00:19.86]I said guys I'm like you [00:21.47]I like monster trucks too [00:22.98]Wanna see how many push ups I can do [00:26.02]I just wish I was queer so I could get [00:28.59]Chicks dig guys that are [00:31.69]Queer guys that don't dig [00:34.65]Chicks that don't dig guys like me [00:37.91]See I'm not queer I'm too ugly [00:41.33]But if I were handsome [00:42.88]Just imagine how great it would be [00:44.75] [00:46.54]Incognito as gay though but not actually [00:48.97]That way though pseudo homo phony [00:50.56] [00:52.81]Maybe it'sa stupid theory or maybe just stupidity [00:55.68]But if I was a queerbee in the fashion industry [00:59.51]Scoring with a super model would be easy [01:03.72] [01:04.61]Cause super model means voluptuous [01:05.94]But is also is synonomous with super dumb [01:08.76] [01:10.45]Ya see I'd be a good listener so shed treat [01:12.67]Me like a sister and soon I'd become [01:15.24] [01:17.71]That trusted friend that cares [01:18.86]That rubs her back and braids her hair [01:20.52]No it wouldnt be a week before I'm in her underwear [01:23.75]I wish I was queer so I could get [01:25.89]Chicks dig guys that are [01:28.93]Queer guys that don't dig [01:31.94]Chicks that don't dig guys like me [01:35.31]See I'm not queer I'm too ugly [01:38.33]Doesnt matter what I'm packin in [01:40.14]My denim it'swhats in my genes [01:42.06] [01:44.10]The only smoked meat the only sausage [01:45.78]I would eat is made by jimmy dean [01:48.08] [01:50.70]See I'm not to keen on the smell of vaseline [01:53.48]No I'm not princess di and I don't wanna be a queen [01:56.60]I wish I was queer so I could get chicks [01:59.92] [02:23.23]Anyway if I were gay [02:24.58]I'd have to change my name to dirk or lewis [02:27.08] [02:29.42]Hang out with my moms hair stylist [02:30.91]His name is kip hes got a lisp he talks like this [02:33.62] [02:35.76]And wear my mothers lingerie learn the songs of broadway [02:38.95]And appreciate depeche mode and avant garde ballet [02:42.13]I wish I was queer so I could get [02:44.44]Chicks dig guys that are [02:47.46]Queer guys that don't dig [02:50.52]Chicks dig guys that are [02:53.47]Queer guys that don't dig [02:56.55]Chicks dig guys that are [02:59.54]Queer guys that don't dig [03:02.41]Chicks that don't dig guys like me [03:06.03]See I'm not queer I'm too ugly [03:09.92] [03:11.05]And I don't shave my heiny [03:13.84] [03:14.40]Don't shave my heiny [03:17.03] [03:18.24]See I'm not queer I'm too ugly [03:21.48] [03:22.92]And I don't shave my heiny [03:26.55]Don't shave my heiny [03:29.16] [03:30.28]See I'm not queer I'm too ugly [03:34.13] [03:35.18]And I don't shave my heiny [03:38.09] [03:38.73]Don't shave my heiny [03:41.14] [03:42.37]See I'm not queer I'm too ugly