All About Sex (Live|口白)-Rodney Carrington

All About Sex (Live) - Rodney Carrington Madison Gale country flower is pooh de pooh freshener, that's what it is. Look it smells like a country flower!! Who wants to eat a country flower? Make a flavor we like chicken, beef bullion, anything. Give me a reason to take my hat off and go down there. I feel like chicken tonight, chicken tonight I had three sisters growin' up there was sh*t in that bathtub I didn't know what it was untill i was 25 years old. Momma had that big water bottle thing hangin off in there. To me that was just a really neat squirt gun. I was in there tryin' to blow it up, bmmmmmp You cant blow that sum b**ch up either youll bust a blood vessel out your head Momma said get that outta your mouth do you know where that's been?!?! She just wants to kill ya cause she thinks shes raisin a f**kin' heathen. Daddy's laughin' his a** off 'cause hes in there 3 hours earlier doin the same damn thing He didn't know what it was either He's in the front yard waterin' the plants with that sum b**ch You don't see those anymore The days of the water bottle are gone Women now days are just naturally fresh They figured out soap works! I married a woman that got's a identical twin sister And uh they look just a like Naturally my wife is well i mean she's... I married way over my f**kin' head. She's gorgeous If she walked in here right now youd be like fmmmmmmmmp what the f**k howd you get her? Personality, that's all i had! But I'll tell you this you marry a twin you date a twin you f**k one you pretty much wanna f**k the other Call me crazy Now here's some real good advice Don't ever bring that up! That was a shity Christmas I got news for ya. I aint never planned to get married Men never plan to get married women do! I'm gonna get married I'm gonna have a big house and hes gonna work and I'm not. Dream on hooker, dream the f**k on. You wanna know why a man gets married I'll tell ya why a man gets married. A man gets married because hes been in a realtionship for so long that he just f**kin' gives up. Alright I'll marry ya. You happy? Oh yeah hahahaha Then comes the planning of the weddin' And everyday is an event to her What do you think about the napkins and the sign in book and my dress and my panties and blah blah blah f**kin blah I don't give a sh*t just make sure theres beer and whiskey when the sh*t's over with Cause ill tell ya somethin' boys at this point and time you dont even no how bad you screwed up. You just know theres a big event coming up and someone you're involved. Then comes the day of the weddin'. Yer dressed up and she's dressed up No turnin' back now is there hmmm nmmmm. Everybody shakin' your hand takin' your picture congratulations You just won a seat in the f**kin senate for all you know Yer clueless cooo cooo cooo cooo cooo coo Afterwards yer at the reception drinkin beer with your buddies oblivious to what the f**k you just did Woooooooooo you sum b**ch ya did it you got married you bastard Then everybody just leaves Now dont you just leave me here. Oh sh*t!