The Wart Hog-Ian Wallace

[ti:The Warthog] [ar:Ian Wallace] [al:Mud, Glorious Mud! The Best of Flanders & Swann] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]The Wart Hog - Ian Wallace [00:07.62]The Jungle was giving a party [00:10.03] [00:10.81]A post hibernation ball [00:12.81] [00:14.01]The Ballroom was crowded with waltzing Gazelles [00:16.99] [00:17.62]Gorillas and Zebras and all [00:19.85] [00:25.68]But who is that animal almost in tears [00:29.00] [00:29.58]Pretending to powder her nose [00:32.14] [00:33.82]A poor little Warthog who sits by herself [00:37.84] [00:39.16]In a pink satin dress with blue bows [00:41.91] [00:43.30]Again she is nobody's choice [00:45.82] [00:46.71]And she sings in a sad little voice [00:50.78] [00:52.35]No one ever wants to court a Warthog [00:54.82] [00:56.11]Though a Warthog does her best [00:58.56] [00:59.82]I've spent a lot of money for a Warthog [01:02.41] [01:03.39]I am kiss buled and datily dressed [01:05.53] [01:07.20]I've lustrinsed my hair [01:08.24] [01:09.00]I'm perfumed here and there [01:10.33] [01:10.95]My gums were tinted when I brushed my teeth [01:13.80] [01:14.76]I'm young and in my prime [01:16.39] [01:17.26]But a wallflower all the time [01:19.22] [01:19.99]'Cos I'm a Warthog [01:20.80] [01:21.69]Just a Warthog [01:22.49] [01:23.68]I'm a Warthog underneath [01:26.04] [01:30.04]Take your partners for a ladies Excuse me [01:32.79] [01:34.10]Excited and radiant she runs on the floor [01:36.77] [01:37.28]To join the furor and fuss [01:39.24] [01:40.37]She taps on each shoulder and says Excuse me [01:43.46] [01:44.60]And each couple replied Excuse us [01:47.55] [01:48.93]Then having no manners at all [01:50.85] [01:51.72]They sing as they dance round the hall [01:54.34] [01:55.93]'No one ever wants to court a Warthog [01:58.20] [01:58.89]Though a Warthog does her best [02:01.31] [02:02.40]Her accessories are dazzling for a Warthog [02:04.60] [02:05.46]She is perfumed and daringly dressed [02:08.00] [02:09.29]We know her these and those are like Marilyn Monroe's [02:12.50]Her gown is just a scintillating sheath [02:14.97] [02:15.89]But she somehow fails to please [02:17.77] [02:18.52]'Cos everybody sees she's a Warthog [02:20.97] [02:21.87]Just a Warthog [02:22.74] [02:23.60]She's a Warthog underneath' [02:26.13] [02:31.50]Head hanging she wanders away from the floor [02:35.10] [02:36.03]This Warthog whom nobody loves [02:39.27] [02:40.49]Then stops in amazement [02:42.10] [02:43.05]For there at the door [02:44.10] [02:44.94]Stands a gentleman Warthog impeccably dressed [02:48.74] [02:49.93]In the act of removing his gloves [02:52.81] [02:54.33]His fine chiseled face seems to frown [02:57.05] [02:58.56]As he looks her first up then then down [03:03.05] [03:05.89]I fancy you must be a sort of Warthog [03:08.74] [03:09.66]Though for a Warthog you look a mess [03:11.87] [03:13.14]That make up's far to heavy for a Warthog [03:15.41] [03:16.53]You could have chosen a more suitable dress [03:18.30] [03:19.85]Did you have to dye your hair [03:21.33] [03:21.89]If that's perfume give me air [03:23.19] [03:23.73]I strongly disapprove of scarlet teeth [03:25.96] [03:27.31]But let us take the floor [03:29.18] [03:29.97]'Cause I'm absolutely sure [03:31.89]That you're a Warthog [03:32.77] [03:33.50]Just a Warthog [03:34.20] [03:35.13]The sweetest little [03:36.58]Neatest little [03:37.40]Dearest and completest little [03:39.30]Warthog underneath