Albert and The 'Eadsman-Stanley Holloway

[ti:Albert And The 'Eadsman] [ar:Stanley Holloway] [al:EMI Comedy Classics] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]Albert and The 'Eadsman - Stanley Holloway [00:06.52]On young Albert Ramsbottom's birthday [00:09.97]His parents asked what he'd like most [00:12.75]He said to see t Tower of London [00:15.70]And gaze upon Anne Boleyn's ghost [00:18.64]They thowt this request were unusual [00:22.27]And at first to refuse were inclined [00:25.24]Til Pa said a trip t metrollopse [00:28.82]Might broaden the little lad's mind [00:31.73]They took charrybank up to London [00:34.82]And got there at quarter to fower [00:37.44]Then seeing as pubs wasn't open [00:40.36]They went straight away to the tower [00:42.98]They didn't think much to the buildin [00:46.09]T weren't what they'd been led to suppose [00:48.98]And the Bad Word' Tower didn't impress them [00:52.14]They said Blackpool had got one of those [00:55.11]At last Albert found a Beefeater [00:58.47]And filled the old chap with alarm [01:01.32]By asking for Ghost of Anne Boleyn [01:04.34]As carried her ead neath her arm [01:07.10]Said Beefeater You ought to come Fridays [01:10.94]If it's ghost of Anne Boleyn you seek [01:13.84]Her union now limits her output [01:16.71]And she only gets one walk a week [01:19.80]But he said if it's ghosts that you're after [01:23.65]There's Lady Jane Grey's to be seen [01:26.68]She runs around chased by the Eadsman [01:29.97]At midnight on the old Tower Green [01:33.01] [01:33.85]They waited on t green till near midnight [01:37.20]Then thinking they'd time for a sup [01:39.88]They took out what food they'd brought with them [01:43.13]And waited for t ghost to turn up [01:46.08]On the first stroke of twelve up jumped Albert [01:50.31]His mouth full of cold dripping toast [01:53.66]With his stick with the orses ead andle [01:57.10]He pointed and said Here's the ghost [02:00.52]They felt their skins going all goosey [02:04.80]As Lady Jane's Spectre drew near [02:07.72]And Albert fair swallered his tonsils [02:11.14]When the Eadsman an all did appear [02:13.76]The Eadsman chased Jane round the grass patch [02:17.74]They saw his axe flash in the moon [02:20.70]And seeing as poor lass were eadless [02:23.65]They wondered what what next he would prune [02:27.38]He suddenly caught sight of Albert [02:30.80]As midnight was on its last chime [02:34.27]As he lifted his axe father murmered [02:37.37]We'll get the insurance this time [02:40.55]At that Mother rose taking umbridge [02:44.31]She said Put that cleaver away [02:47.42]You're not cutting our Albert's ead off [02:50.35]Yon collar were clean on today [02:53.00]The brave little lad stood undaunted [02:55.41] [02:56.74]Til the ghost were within half a pace [02:59.64]Then taking the toast he were eating [03:02.72]Slapped it dripping side down in his face [03:07.10]T were a proper set back for the Eadsman [03:09.59]He let out one owl of despair [03:12.66]Then taking his ladyfriend with him [03:15.33]He disappeared just like that there [03:18.70] [03:19.35]When Pa saw the way as they vanished [03:22.94]He trembled with fear and looked blue [03:26.15]Til Ma went and patted his shoulder [03:28.92]An said Sallright lad we saw it too [03:33.62]Some say twere the drippin as done it [03:36.04]From a roast leg of mutton it came [03:38.94]And as the Eadsman had been a Beefeater [03:42.13]They reckon he vanished from shame [03:45.00]And around Tower Green from that moment [03:48.69]They've nere seen a sign of the ghost [03:52.43]But when t Beefeaters go on night duty [03:55.67]They take slices of cold drippin toast