The Gift-The Velvet Underground

[ti:The Gift] [ar:The Velvet Underground] [al:White Light / White Heat (Super Deluxe) (45th Anniversary)] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]The Gift - The Velvet Underground (地下丝绒) [00:01.94]Waldo Jeffers had reached his limit [00:04.49]It was now mid-august [00:06.22]Which meant that he had been separated [00:08.04]From marsha for more than two months [00:10.26]Two months and all he had to show were three dog-eared letters [00:13.36]And two very expensive long distance phone calls [00:16.89]True when school had ended and she'd returned to wisconsin [00:20.09]And he to locust pennsylvania [00:22.08]She had sworn to maintain a certain fidelity [00:25.50]She would date occasionally but merely as amusement [00:29.11]She would remain faithful [00:31.21]But lately waldo had begun to worry [00:34.37]He had trouble sleeping at night [00:36.63]And when he did he had horrible dreams [00:40.03]He lay awake at night [00:41.59]Tossing and turning underneath his printed quilt protector [00:45.24]Tears welling in his eyes [00:47.10]As he pictured marsha [00:48.62]Her sworn vows overcome by [00:51.11]Liquor and the smooth soothings of some neanderthal [00:54.44]Finally submitting to the final caresses of sexual oblivion [00:59.09]It was more than the human mind could bear [01:02.20]Visions of marsha's faithlessness haunted him [01:05.27]Daytime fantasies of sexual abandon permeated his thoughts [01:09.81]And the thing was they wouldn't understand who she really was [01:13.89]He waldo alone understood this [01:16.77]He had intuitively grasped every nook and cranny of her psyche [01:20.75]He had made her smile and she needed him [01:23.72]And he wasn't there [01:25.93]The idea came to him on the thursday [01:27.93]Before the mummers parade was scheduled to appear [01:30.49]He had just finished mowing and edging [01:32.10]The edelsons lawn for a dollar-fifty [01:33.95]And had checked the mailbox to see [01:35.82]If there was at least a word from marsha [01:38.03]There was nothing more than a circular [01:39.61]Form the amalgamated aluminum company of america [01:41.74]Inquiring into his awning needs [01:43.98]At least they cared enough to write [01:46.42]It was a new york company [01:48.58]You could go anywhere in the mails [01:51.10]Then it struck him [01:52.90]He didn't have enough money to go [01:54.37]To wisconsin in the accepted fashion [01:56.01]True but why not mail himself [01:59.01]It was absurdly simple [02:00.73]He would ship himself parcel post special delivery [02:04.62]The next day waldo went to the supermarket [02:06.78]To purchase the necessary equipment [02:08.82]He bought masking tape a staple gun and a medium sized [02:12.61]Cardboard box just right for a person of his build [02:15.46]He judged that with a minimum of jostling [02:17.30]He could ride quite comfortably [02:19.38]A few airholes some water [02:21.37]A selection of midnight snacks [02:23.03]And it would probably be as good as going tourist [02:26.42]By friday afternoon waldo was set [02:28.90]He was thoroughly packed and the post office [02:30.71]Had agreed to pick him up at three o'clock [02:32.88]He'd marked the package "FRAGILE" [02:34.77]And as he sat curled up inside [02:36.42]Resting in the foam rubber cushioning he'd thoughtfully included [02:39.51]He tried to picture the look of awe [02:41.46]And happiness on marsha's face [02:42.78]As she opened the door saw the package tipped the deliverer [02:46.42]And then opened it to see her waldo finally there in person [02:50.26]She would kiss him and then maybe they could see a movie [02:54.27]If he'd only thought of this before [02:56.85]Suddenly rough hands gripped his package [02:59.34]And he felt himself borne up [03:01.46]He landed with a thud in a truck [03:03.37]And then he was off [03:04.98]Marsha bronson had just finished setting her hair [03:08.11]It had been a very rough weekend [03:10.74]She had to remember not to drink like that [03:13.68]Bill had been nice about it though [03:15.75]After it was over he'd said that he still respected her and [03:18.68]After all [03:19.54]It was certainly the way of nature and even though no [03:22.25]He didn't love her [03:23.52]He did feel an affection for her [03:26.24]And after all they were grown adults [03:28.98]Oh what bill could teach waldo [03:31.66]But that seemed many years ago [03:34.59]Sheila klein [03:35.77]Her very very best friend walked in through [03:38.39]The porch screen door into the kitchen [03:41.71]Oh god it's absolutely maudlin outside [03:44.76]Ugh I know what you mean I feel all icky [03:49.10]Marsha tightened the belt on her cotton robe [03:51.36]With the silk outer edge [03:53.11]Sheila ran her finger over some salt grains on the kitchen table [03:56.35]Licked her finger and made a face [03:59.12]I'm supposed to be taking these salt pills but [04:01.17]She wrinkled her nose [04:02.56]They make me feel like throwing up [04:05.10]Marsha started to pat herself under the chin [04:07.60]An exercise she'd seen on television [04:10.32]God don't even talk about that [04:12.88]She got up from the table and went to the sink [04:15.07]Where she picked up a bottle of pink and blue vitamins [04:17.57]Want one Supposed to be better than steak [04:19.77]And attempted to touch her knees [04:22.22]I don't think I'll ever touch a daiquiri again [04:25.39]She gave up and sat down [04:27.05]This time nearer the small table that supported the telephone [04:30.97]Maybe bill'll call [04:32.36]She said to sheila's glance [04:34.20]Sheila nibbled on a cuticle [04:36.52]After last night I thought maybe you'd be through with him [04:40.02]I know what you mean [04:41.26]My god [04:41.90]He was like an octopus [04:42.98]Hands all over the place [04:44.82]She gestured [04:45.55]Raising her arms upward in defense [04:47.70]The thing is after a while [04:49.01]You get tired of fighting with him [04:50.57]You know and after all he didn't really do anything [04:53.09]Friday and saturday so I kind of owed it to him [04:55.39]You know what I mean [04:56.89]She started to scratch [04:58.88]Sheila was giggling with her hand over her mouth [05:01.67]I'll tell you I felt the same way and even after a while [05:05.20]She bent forward in a whisper [05:07.12]I wanted to [05:08.45]And now she as laughing very loudly [05:11.20]It was at this point that [05:12.44]Mr Jameson of the clarence arrow post office [05:14.95]Rang the door bell of the large tucco colored frame house [05:18.45]When marsha bronson pened the door [05:20.24]He helped her carry the package in [05:22.32]He had his yellow and his green slips of paper signed [05:24.89]And left with a fifteen-cent tip [05:26.55]That marsha had gotten out of her mothers [05:28.32]Small beige pocket book in the den [05:30.78]What do you think it is [05:31.93]Sheila asked [05:33.37]Marsha stood with her arms folded behind her back [05:36.15]She stared at the brown cardboard carton [05:38.19]That sat in the middle of the living room [05:40.25]I don't know [05:42.13]Inside the package waldo quivered with excitement [05:44.98]As he listened to the muffled voices [05:47.15]Sheila ran her fingernail over the masking tape [05:49.70]That ran down the center of the carton [05:52.09]Why don't you look at the return address [05:53.82]And see who it is from [05:55.81]Waldo felt his heart beating [05:57.81]He could feel the vibrating footsteps [06:00.30]It would be soon [06:02.17]Marsha walked around the carton [06:03.69]And read the ink-scratched label [06:06.13]Ugh god it's from waldo [06:08.57]That schmuck [06:09.83]Said sheila [06:11.65]Waldo trembled with expectation [06:14.38]Well you might as well open it [06:16.20]Said sheila [06:16.81]Both of them tried to lift the stapled flap [06:19.86]Ah s**t [06:21.43]Said marsha groaning [06:22.32]He must have nailed it shut [06:24.41]They tugged at the flap again [06:26.77]My god you need a power drill to get this thing opened [06:30.46]They pulled again [06:32.04]You can't get a grip [06:35.29]They both stood still breathing heavily [06:38.77]Why don't you get the scissors [06:40.01]Said sheila [06:41.65]Marsha ran into the kitchen [06:43.49]But all she could find was a little sewing scissor [06:46.61]Then she remembered that [06:47.59]Her father kept a collection of tools in the basement [06:50.41]She ran downstairs and when she came back [06:52.63]She had a large sheet-metal cutter in her hand [06:55.78]This is the best I could find [06:57.54]She was very out of breath [06:59.12]Here you do it I'm gonna die [07:01.89]She sank into a large fluffy couch and exhaled noisily [07:06.92]Sheila tried to make a slit between the masking tape [07:09.45]And the end of the cardboard [07:11.39]But the blade was too big and there wasn't enough room [07:14.41]Godamn this thing [07:16.41]She said feeling very exasperated [07:18.54]Then smiling [07:19.91]I got an idea [07:21.66]What [07:22.32]Said marsha [07:23.01]Just watch [07:23.61]Said sheila touching her finger to her head [07:26.25]Inside the package waldo was so transfixed with [07:29.57]Excitement that he could barely breathe [07:32.06]His skin felt prickly from the heat [07:34.22]And he could feel his heart beating in his throat [07:37.07]It would be soon [07:39.53]Sheila stood quite upright and walked around [07:42.34]To the other side of the package [07:44.50]Then she sank down to her knees [07:46.61]Grasped the cutter by both handles [07:48.84]Took a deep breath and plunged the long blade [07:51.78]Through the middle of the package [07:53.65]Through the masking tape [07:54.86]Through the cardboard through the cushioning [07:56.93]And right through the center of waldo jeffers head [08:00.39]Which split slightly and caused little rhythmic arcs [08:02.97]Of red to pulsate gently in the morning sun