Shticks Of One And A Half Dozen Of The Other-Allan Sherman

[ti:Shticks Of One And A Half Dozen Of The Other] [ar:Allan Sherman] [al:My Son, The Celebrity] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]Shticks Of One And A Half Dozen Of The Other - Allan Sherman [00:06.91]She wheels her wheelbarrow [00:08.11] [00:10.06]Through streets that are narrow [00:11.48] [00:13.59]Her barrow is narrow her hips are too wide [00:17.38] [00:20.00]So wherever she wheels it [00:21.43] [00:23.04]The neighborhood feels it [00:24.18] [00:27.07]Her girdle keeps scraping the homes on each side [00:30.02] [00:33.00]In Dublin's fair city [00:34.29] [00:35.92]Where girls are so pretty [00:37.10] [00:38.75]My Molly stands out 'cause she weighs 18 stone [00:42.70] [00:43.54](That's 256 pounds ) [00:45.01] [00:46.97]I don't mind her fat but [00:49.77] [00:55.18]It's not only that but [00:57.88] [00:59.74]She's cockeyed and muscle-bound Molly Malone [01:07.63] [01:13.99]I know a man his name is Lang [01:17.99]And he has a neon sign [01:21.77] [01:22.64]And Mister Lang is very old [01:27.33]So they call it Old Lang's Sign [01:30.75] [01:34.53]Oh what have you done Billy Sol Billy Sol [01:38.99]Oh what have you done charming Billy [01:42.36] [01:43.77]You took almost every cent [01:46.17]From the you S Government [01:48.38]Which you spent on fertilizer which is silly [01:51.77] [01:58.68]All day all night Cary Grant [02:01.69] [02:02.97]That's all I hear from my wife is Cary Grant [02:06.37] [02:07.89]What can he do that I can't [02:11.17] [02:12.63]Big deal big star Cary Grant [02:15.82] [02:21.34]Oh the moon is bright tonight upon the car wash [02:25.17] [02:25.82]So I'm having my Volkswagen washed again [02:29.37] [02:30.64]But the way things go with me the way my luck is [02:34.78] [02:35.43]Just as soon as they're finished it will rain [02:38.69] [02:43.53]On top of Old Smoky [02:45.03] [02:45.72]All covered with hair [02:47.20] [02:48.20]Of course I'm referring [02:49.54] [02:50.30]To Smoky The Bear [02:51.49] [03:02.21]Every time you take vaccine [03:04.30]Take it orally [03:06.28] [03:06.83]As you know the other way [03:09.01]Is more painfully [03:10.74] [03:16.01]My grandfather's clock was the best ever made [03:20.00] [03:20.51]By the Timex company [03:23.55] [03:25.42]Just like the clock John Cameron Swayze displayed [03:29.91]Last night on the old tv [03:33.21] [03:34.70]Oh it works under water so perfectly [03:38.63] [03:39.20]And still makes a ticking sound [03:42.72] [03:44.01]Which my grandfather tried only this afternoon [03:48.82]And that's how the old man drowned [03:52.23] [03:59.06]Do not make a stingy sandwich [04:01.45]Pile the cold cuts high [04:02.72] [04:03.59]Customers should see salami [04:05.91]Coming through the rye [04:07.51] [04:15.10]Oh I diet all day and I diet all night [04:17.34]It's enough to drive me bats [04:18.92] [04:19.43]Got no gravy or potatoes [04:20.58]'Cause the whole refrigerator's [04:21.82]Fulla polyunsaturated fats [04:23.63] [04:24.23]Fare thee well Metrecal [04:25.91] [04:26.43]And the others of that ilk [04:28.27] [04:28.82]Let the diet start tomorrow [04:30.15]'Cause today I'll drown my sorrow [04:31.38]In a double malted milk [04:33.02] [04:38.23]When you go to the delicatessen store [04:40.34] [04:41.01]Don't buy the liverwurst [04:42.66] [04:43.35]Don't buy the liverwurst [04:44.91] [04:45.45]Don't buy the liverwurst [04:47.51]I repeat what I just said before [04:49.54] [04:50.21]Don't buy the liverwurst [04:51.74] [04:52.36]Don't buy the liverwurst [04:54.94] [04:56.16]Oh buy the corned beef if you must [04:58.72]The pickled herring you can trust [05:00.90]And the lox puts you in orbit aok [05:03.99] [05:05.44]But that big hunk of liverwurst [05:07.67]Has been there since October First [05:10.06]And today is the Twenty-Third of May [05:13.40] [05:15.08]So when you go to the delicatessen store [05:17.51]Don't buy the liverwurst [05:19.25] [05:20.02]Don't buy the liverwurst [05:21.87] [05:22.55]Don't buy the liverwurst [05:24.47]It'll make your insides awful sore [05:26.52] [05:27.10]Don't buy the liverwurst [05:28.66] [05:29.20]Don't buy the liverwurst