My Senseless Theory-Destinity

I can hear myself screaming out the backdoor Looking in my spirit the inflicted sufferings. Stop! Stop the aching inside! Stop! Stop the burning spirit! My senseless theory is rising once again blackening the pure beauty of what surrounds me... I am the pain I am the lie I am the one I wanna see die... No more tears in your eyes! Too much things to forget! I am the pain I am the lie I am the one I wanna see die... Causing pain and hate within＇ my mind Why I need to analyze my existence? I＇m lost in the lightning Darkness of life! Lost in thoughts of myself with no answers. Day after day like a lifetime away I keep it so sad. Night after night I keep it true... Nothing could be the same again. This theory returns to me all the time. Let me know if it＇s a suffering that I inflict myself? A need of suffering?