Mephesto And Kevin-Primus

[ti:Mephesto And Kevin (《南方公园》动画片插曲)] [ar:Primus] [al:Chef Aid: The South Park Album] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.01]Mephesto And Kevin (《南方公园》动画片插曲) - Primus (第一乐队) [00:00.02]Written by：Primus/Trey Parker [00:00.03] [00:00.53]In 1986 the university of California at Davis [00:02.39]Saw two of its all time brightest stars [00:04.26]Dr Alphonse Mephisto and Dr Arnie Apesacrappin [00:06.80]Dr Mephisto worked hard towards his thesis his goal [00:08.97]Was to genetically duplicate the DNA structure of asparagus [00:11.36]So that all asparagus would grow to the same girth and length [00:13.56]Giving asparagus a much more pleasant presentation in the world's [00:15.73]Supermarket vegetable bins [00:17.05]Dr Apesacrappin's goal was to genetically create the greatest [00:19.32]Musical entertainer the world had ever seen [00:21.12]Dr Apesacrappin knew that if he could assemble the right elements [00:23.65]He could theoretically build a DNA structure that would ensure [00:25.77]His creation had talent far surpassing the average individual [00:28.45]At the time one subject of urban myth was the story that [00:30.51]Michael Jackson in an effort to maintain his youthful look and [00:32.84]Feminine vocal characteristics had his testicles surgically removed [00:35.58]Thereby making him a modern day castrato [00:37.87]If such a rumor were true Michael Jackson more than likely would have [00:40.46]Had some of his semen preserved before the surgery to ensure the [00:43.26]Future of his name and lineage [00:44.95] [00:45.65]Word came back to [00:46.27]Dr Apesacrappin of a secret cold storage locker [00:48.30]Deep within the bowels of the UCLA research center that not only [00:51.25]Contained four containers of frozen semen but also held a pair of [00:54.33]Testicles each was labeled with the name Jack Michaelson [00:57.42] [01:01.56]I once heard a noise [01:02.35] [01:03.24]In the night the most sensual voice [01:05.13] [01:06.12]Song of love from an angelic boy [01:07.88] [01:08.95]Stuck in my head [01:10.27] [01:11.58]And this is what he said [01:12.74]I am gopher boy [01:15.45]Pondering reality [01:18.32]I am gopher boy [01:20.98]Who will buy my raspberries [01:23.73]This had to be the seed of the king of pop [01:25.88]Dr Apesacrappin was able to use his charm and chiseled Greek [01:28.39]Features to woo a young lab technician by the name of Jennifer who of [01:31.49]Course just happened to have the proper access needed to obtain a small vial [01:34.47]Of the precious semen [01:35.92]The search for the egg was a short one Dr Mephisto simply ran an ad [01:38.46]In the classified section of an LA music magazine the ad read [01:41.65]Wanted unfertilized human eggs for genetic experiment donors must [01:45.01]Have musical background with a plethora of young eager wanna be [01:47.84]Musical starlets willing to sell their eggs the two doctors after [01:51.00]Rigorous auditioning picked and purchased [01:53.30] [01:54.10]Dr Apesacrappin felt that it would be far less complicated legally if the [01:57.10]Fetus were brought to term [01:58.01]In the womb of a non human he had long since [02:00.53]Secured the services of the university volleyball mascot a llama by the [02:03.62]Name of Missy [02:04.48]When the baby was ready [02:05.53]The child was removed via cesarean it was a healthy baby [02:08.37]Boy he was named Kevin [02:09.65] [02:11.07]I once heard a noise [02:11.88] [02:12.74]In the night the most sensual voice [02:14.62] [02:15.56]Song of love from an angelic boy [02:17.40] [02:18.40]Stuck in my head [02:19.70] [02:21.12]And this is what he said [02:22.41]I am gopher boy [02:25.00]Pondering reality [02:27.71]I am gopher boy [02:30.43]Who will buy my raspberries [02:33.13]Kevin was a beautiful child Dr Apesacrappin saw to it that Kevin was [02:36.09]Trained by the best in all aspects of performing [02:38.55]His voice was golden and had a [02:39.86]Sweetness to it that most males lacked he moved with grace and was able to [02:43.17]Moonwalk by the time he was three as Kevin grew with his talent Dr Apesacrappin [02:46.88]Started noticing odd developments in his physical state when Kevin lost his baby [02:50.45]Teeth his secondaries came in with a vengeance they were at least twice [02:53.66]The size of a normal adult's [02:54.82]And the two in front stuck nearly straight out also [02:57.31]As Kevin reached his eighth year [02:58.84]He was the same height as he was when he was four to [03:01.09]Top it off he was growing hair all over [03:02.92]And his penis was enormous even by adult [03:04.96]Standards [03:05.78]It also dawned on the doctor [03:06.72]That even through all the years of hearing Kevin sing [03:09.38]He rarely spoke often choosing to communicate with various grunts and gurgles [03:13.00] [03:18.34]I once heard a noise [03:19.15] [03:20.04]In the night the most sensual voice [03:21.91] [03:22.78]Song of love from an angelic boy [03:24.63] [03:25.65]Stuck in my head [03:27.13] [03:28.39]And this is what he said [03:29.71]I am gopher boy [03:31.67] [03:32.18]Pondering reality [03:34.86]I am gopher boy [03:37.68]Who will buy my raspberries [03:40.03] [03:40.66]Others were noticing the changes in Kevin children began to tease him [03:43.56]To call him gopher boy [03:45.14]One day a bully by the name of big Roy started throwing bananas at him [03:48.45]Soon a crowd of kids were all throwing bananas [03:50.52]Suddenly in a fury Kevin rushed at big Roy [03:52.83]And bit three fingers off on his left hand [03:54.47] [03:55.09]Kevin was taken away and placed in the custody of the state [03:57.07]Dr Apesacrappin's actions were found out but because there was no legislation [04:01.01]Concerning the genetic construction of another human being [04:03.38]No criminal charges were brought forth [04:04.88]The medical association's board of ethics stripped him of all his credentials [04:07.35] [04:07.86]And his reputation was ruined [04:08.99] [04:09.74]In fact his name became so synonymous with failure that for years to come [04:12.64]Med students around the world were known to say in times of mishaps [04:15.63]Damn I feel just like Apesacrappin [04:17.17] [04:18.29]Dr Mephisto immediately began proceedings to adopt little Kevin [04:20.54] [04:21.13]Being a noted scientist and the creator of the cloned asparagus [04:23.91]It wasn't long before the two were legally united as father and son [04:27.04]They moved to Colorado where they live in relative obscurity [04:29.51]Kevin is still a boy of few spoken words [04:31.57]Sticking mainly to his grunts and gurgles [04:33.45]But on occasion if you listen closely [04:35.20]You can hear his sweet golden signing voice ring out [04:37.69]Into the night over the small town of south park [04:39.95] [04:41.11]I am gopher boy [04:45.36]Pondering reality [04:49.04] [04:49.55]I am gopher boy [04:53.37] [04:53.89]Who will buy my raspberries