Gentleman-Said The Whale

I am a lovesick gentleman Who pines and pines over the smallest things Most of them are truly inconsequential They are inconsequential things So I'll write you the longest letter Describing my feelings and all these stupid things I'll cross my fingers that your heart melts And you look at me and tell me "Darling, where have you been?" I am an uncool Canadian kid Awed and inspired by all the popular guys Most of them are truly irresponsible They do irresponsible things But I'm just a heartbroke gentleman And gentlemen never seem to get gentle women I need a small town girl To follow me home and teach me how to be a real man I am a gentleman An old soul gentleman A plain-jane gentleman A hold-the-door-for-you gentleman A no good gentleman A stupid, boring gentleman A dumbstruck gentleman A gentle, gentle, gentleman