Hello-Tim Minchin

[ti:Hello] [ar:Tim Minchin] [al:Darkside] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]Hello (你好) - Tim Minchin [00:00.58]Hello [00:01.32] [00:04.89]Welcome to my show [00:06.11] [00:07.47]We're glad that you could come [00:09.61] [00:10.63]We're gonna have a hoot [00:11.92]We're gonna have some fun [00:13.75] [00:15.74]Sit back [00:16.50] [00:17.25]Put your feet up and relax [00:19.11] [00:20.21]I hope you've had a drink or three [00:23.07] [00:24.28]The more you've drunk [00:25.53]The better I will be [00:27.67] [00:29.63]And if you have a mobile phone [00:32.02]Please turn it off [00:33.20] [00:41.05]Thank you [00:42.47] [00:44.15]And if you have tourette's syndrome [00:46.82]Just do whatever it is you people do [00:50.49] [00:52.14]And if you are offended by strong language or blasphemy [00:57.53]Maybe you should chuff off home [01:00.76] [01:02.14]Cause it's only gonna get worse [01:04.05]Only gonna get worse [01:05.74]Only gonna get worse [01:07.46]From now on [01:08.94] [01:12.21]Cunt [01:12.60] [01:13.21]My name is Tim [01:14.11] [01:14.65]I write funny songs and sing [01:16.78]And if you don't think funny songs are funny [01:19.05] [01:20.32]Well I respect your right [01:22.05]To think exactly what you like [01:24.08]But you're sure as sh*t not getting back your money [01:26.87] [01:28.31]And if you write for a newspaper I'd just like to say [01:32.18] [01:32.85]That I read your publication every single day [01:37.21] [01:38.14]And I agree with absolutely everything you say [01:42.67] [01:43.34]I think you're the most perspicacious and delightful [01:46.69]Eloquent insightful writer [01:48.80]Writing on the subject of the arts [01:52.14] [01:53.59]But if you write a bad review [01:56.00]I promise you I'll come round to your house [01:59.53]And lay turds in all your potted indoor plants [02:03.59]I'll lay turds [02:05.05] [02:05.94]In all your plants [02:07.64] [02:08.31]Your indoor plants [02:10.10]Your potted indoor plants [02:12.35] [02:17.47]Hello [02:18.15] [02:18.88]Welcome to my show [02:21.45]I'm glad you all could come come come [02:24.60] [02:25.40]It's time for a little audience participation [02:28.71] [02:30.23]Sing yeah [02:31.17] [02:32.10]Yeah [02:32.87]Sing yeah [02:33.86] [02:34.45]Yeah [02:35.47]Sing [02:35.84]Yeah yeah yeah [02:37.24]Yeah yeah yeah [02:38.38]Sing [02:38.76]Ooo yeah [02:40.13]Ooo yeah [02:41.30]Sing I am an audience member [02:43.25] [02:44.18]I am an audience member [02:45.99] [02:46.70]Why are you making me sing [02:48.49] [02:49.38]Why are you making me sing [02:51.42]You self indulgent wanker [02:53.60] [02:54.15]You self indulgent wanker [02:56.54]Just get on with the f**king show [02:58.67] [02:59.28]Just get on with the f**king show